April 12, 2009

Boobs Aren't All That Bad

It's really kind of an oddity, boobs. Well it was for me. I knew the functional purpose for boobs growing up with regards to babies. My mom did a good job of teaching me that. But that was it. So when I started to get them, I thought it would be great. And then my mom took me bra shopping which gave me a harsh dose of reality.

I had gone my whole life care free and unrestrained with nothing but a shirt, and now I had to wear a contraption under my shirt that was supposed to contain them?!?! Well this just wasn't comfortable and it inhibited my way of life. Boys didn't so much like them as they liked to pop the bra strap in the back in an effort to humiliate you. Or maybe they were trying to get as close to touching a booby as they could since it would be quite awhile for most of them.

Then as the boobies got bigger they just seemed to get in the way. When you ran in any sport they would bounce up and down to sky and ground over and over and over. The bigger they were, the worse they bounced. And this didn't feel so comfortable either. I'm wondering now why sports bras weren't mandatory for PE when I was in school. Maybe they were in some schools but not ours. It sure would have helped. They just contributed to my awkwardness growing up since one minute you don't have them and all of sudden, before you know it, you're sprouting these benign tumors that just keep growing and growing and serve you no immediate purpose other than pain and discomfort.

Anyways I had no idea back then that they would turn out to be a source of "stimulation"...but that's where I'll leave it. They also contribute to looking and feeling more feminine. So it turns out they're not so bad. But of course the older we get the saggier they get. oh no...

Speaking of saggy boobies and the functional purpose of boobies for the nourishment of babies, did any of you see the clip of Al Roker sharing his brush with both on the Today Show? If you haven't seen it, here is the link to the video. Watch at your own risk as you will feel so sorry for his child that he put this out there in the universe. But it is funny.
http://www.eonline.com/videos/v19191253001_The_Soup_The_Price_of_Porn.html

So I guess the moral of this post is that boobs aren't all that bad if you're a woman.

9 comments:

Mr. Guesa said...

No matter what anyone says, boobs are awesome. I'm glad you posted this, because it reaffirms my opinion on the topic.

Brian Sorgatz said...

I like to call them breasts rather than boobs, or else I think I'm turning into my father. But I'm sure glad that women have them, even if they can be unwieldy.

Horatio said...

I almost didn't comment (since having three guys in a row comment on a boobs post only adds to the stereotype). Nevertheless, bully for boobs!

Amber Sunshine said...

it's ok to perpetuate the stereotype...girls that have boobs like it that guys like them...especially if they are flawed elsewhere...i'm kind of surprised the ladies aren't chiming in...after all they were awkward to get used to in the beginning...

UpTheTaoStaircase said...

They're not so bad, they have their ups and downs :)

Great post, though. You certainly nailed the confusion we have about them in childhood! I remember the massive insecurity and secret pride so well.

Amber Sunshine said...

Great way to say it!!

Grayspirit said...

Funny. Nice way to also characterize it from the male's perspective.

Danielle said...

I just randomly found your blog. Anyway, I'm 13 and I got so mad a while ago because I was flat chested until recently. I guess I was upset because I was tall and thin and flat and my (mean) friend said I looked like an ironing board. I don't care so much anymore.

Amber Sunshine said...

Hang in there Danielle...anyone that would make a joke like that to you, feels inferior to you in some other way...Kids are mean at 13...and it doesn't necessarily end until you get to college...don't let their meanness cause you to be mean to others or to get you down...Life turns out so much better if you ignore the stupidity of others...If I survived it...you can too!!
Thanks for stopping by! on my birthday no doubt!!